I spent much of my life putting up walls around me. I’m so happy to see that I’m finally dismantling those walls, and letting life in. I finally understand that it’s my thinking that builds the walls, and it’s my heart that allows them to come down. My thoughts (the negative, limiting, self-sabotaging ones) create the walls or the barriers that kept me living a small life, but when I’m quiet and peaceful enough to listen to what my heart is telling me (the way I really feel deep down- my hopes, dreams and desires) and acknowledge that truth, the barriers dissolve.
We spend much of our lives trying to be something we’re not, at least I did. I tried to be the perfect girlfriend, or the perfect wife, the perfect sister, the perfect mother, the perfect daughter, the perfect employee. Little did I realize that #1-there is no perfect anything, and #2, trying to accomplish anything by being perfect is like trying to collect water in a sieve. No matter how hard you try, it will never fill you up. You’ll always be left with that feeling that something is missing.
There is a significant difference between leading with your head, and leading with your heart. I’ve found that whenever I’ve tried to force things (which were usually a result of thinking that I needed to do something-in order to produce a desired outcome) it has generally resulted in the opposite occurring. Yet when I feel inspired to do something, and I’ve followed through on whatever it was, it always proves to be the right move. In fact, it usually turns out better than I hoped, and it’s almost happens effortlessly.
I firmly believe that we would not have dreams in our hearts if we were not meant to live them. Your hopes and dreams and aspirations are not merely destined to remain hobbies. Whatever ignites your passion, fuels your fire or lights you up, that my dear is exactly what you need to spend more time doing.
It’s not selfish, don’t even think that. It’s one of the greatest gifts you can give yourself, your family, and the world. When we fill ourselves up, we generate the power and the resources to fill others up. It is our job to help others with our gifts and talents.
Whether it’s your sense of humour, your compassion, your skills in certain trades, your painting, your writing, your leadership, your willingness to go the extra mile, we all have gifts. And they are gifts that only we can give.
We recently removed a wall between our kitchen and living room. It was something we’d talked about doing for quite a while and finally decided to do it. I was amazed at how good it felt to take down the wall, to open up our living space, to let the light shine through. To be opening things up instead of closing them off not only brightened my living room, it brightened my life.
Let the walls come down and let your light shine. You may be the light in someone else’s darkness. There is no greater gift than that.
I'm a Certified Body Language Trainer and Speaker, columnist for Canadian Firefighter magazine and self publish author. I've combined my love of personal development with my passion for the fire service and I teach fire service members across Canada about the power of body language.